A school-run tabloid, best known for being featured in a Waffle Press article, recently organised a symposium for Singapore’s student journalism societies. Waffle Press reports.

The symposium began with an attempt by student journalists to arrive at an understanding of what exactly it meant to be a student journalist, confirming observers’ suspicions that they were never quite sure what they were doing.

Nonetheless, analysts praised the symposium for taking bold steps into the future of journalism. In the past, journalism meant diligently drafting, writing and reading the works of journalists. These dated methods were replaced by the modern practice: icebreaker games and desultory discussions among student journalists.

The symposium also revealed that many of the school journalists were very strongly opinionated, a trait that is regarded essential for good journalism. Fortunately, all of their opinions were identical and adhered to the school approved framework, thereby allowing them to efficiently engage the student body without any of the pointless bickering that typifies freedom of speech.

The symposium further served to remind student journalists that their writing must operate within restrictions. A prominent figure at the symposium gave the following rationale: “We are the school press, not the alternative press.” The exact meaning of this was lost on many attendees, who were later seen discussing the functions of various types of presses.

The school press later clarified on the one and only correct meaning of the statement, conclusively closing the topic to further debate.

Observers conclude that the outreach session was highly productive. Different schools brought new perspectives to the discussion table, introducing student journalists to entirely new ways of generating trivial discourse.

Attendees were exposed to different writing forms as each unique press club shared their speciality. Student journalists who had spent their careers writing platitudes were awed by the potential of other techniques such as truisms and banalities. “It really helped me get out of my one-track mindset and showed me the countless possibilities” said Word of Mouth contributor Yap Yes Ser.

The editors at The Waffle Press are heartened to see the fledgling publications come together to promote an independent fourth estate. Editor-General Dr Coconut called it “adorable” and wishes them all the best.